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Sunday, February 19, 2012

The Turning Point

I introduced myself in the previous post so you could get a sense of who I am and what brought me to this point in my life. I never thought that walking away from a stable job would completely change my life. I'm not an idiot, I do understand that some change was inevitable. But, we're talking 180 degrees here!

I was a single Mom of 2 children. I weighed the decision to leave the job very carefully. I had some money saved and knew I could live off of my savings for 6 months. I figured I had 6 months to get a better sense of starting my own business. My parents stepped up to help out because they "wanted me to succeed and have a fair shot of running my own business".

After leaving the job, I wasn't prepared for the depression that enveloped me. It felt as though I was going through a divorce all over again. I had some trouble getting moving at the beginning of the day. I found that I took more naps than a person should. I couldn't seem to help myself. Until the day I realized what was happening to me. Then I started to come out of the funk.

I knew I needed to find something that was mine. I gave a lot of myself to my children and the former job. I had no real identity other than those two things. No wonder I fell into such a depression after I left a job that consumed 12+ hours of my life a day! I think I was watching to much tv at the time and suddenly it hit me.......

I went out with a girlfriend of mine. We went to this local club. Hip hop music. Younger crowd. A lot of people under the influence. You know the drill, right? Well, after about 20 minutes in the club, I was dancing next to my friend when I feel this hand reach up my skirt and grab my ass! What the hell just happened? I turn around to see this guy smiling at me with his hand up my skirt and he tries to plant one on my lips! That was it! I was out of there. I do not want to be assaulted on the dance floor! When the heck did it get this bad out there, anyway? Have I really been so consumed with work and out of the loop, that I hadn't noticed what was going on in the world around me?

I think that was the moment that I figured out what I wanted to do, what I wanted to involve myself in and what direction I wanted my life to go in. I started looking up ballroom dancing clinics, lessons or anything I could find. Most were out of my area. I stumbled across a country bar in the area and they give free lessons on Thursday and Saturday night. I picked up the phone and called my good guy friend and planned to go that Saturday.

We got there pretty early, ready for that first lesson, which happened to be a line dance. Followed by the next lesson which was a sweetheart dance. I remember it so clearly. Even 5 years later. The dance instructor, having the patience of a saint, trying to diplomatically tell me which way to turn and that I was not turning the right way. I could not understand what I was supposed to do for the life of me.

As the night pressed on, we sat at our table on the opposite side of the dance floor, which is blocked by the bar. My guy friend, Rob, ordered food and talked me off the ledge after the terrible lesson. Eventually, the dance instructor came over to talk to us and reassure me that it takes time and practice. He encouraged me to not give up. Rob and I decided to take a look around and see if we could meet new people.

As we made our way around the dance floor, we noticed people everywhere. My attention was drawn to the dance floor. I was totally amazed at what I was seeing. There were all these people who knew every line dance that was called. Then a two-step was called. Men would walk over and ask a lady to dance. He would respectfully dance with her in a continuous circle around the dance floor. I watched in utter amazement that they all looked like they knew what they were doing and I was more impressed with how respectful the men were with the women. I knew I had found my calling. And I also knew that I would not find a single asshole who would try to feel me up on that dance floor. It seemed to be about the dancing here and that's exactly what I was looking for!

Single mother, personal trainer and now, attempted dancer. Life would become very, very fun and also very, very surreal..........

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