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Wednesday, May 9, 2012

What would you do?

Before I get to the heart of this blog, I want to make sure everyone understands that I am not degrading Billy. In fact, it's quite opposite. We all have a tendency to take ourselves too seriously, and I LOVE poking some fun at my "teammate".

I say "teammate" because a relationship is supposed to be a partnership. The word EQUALITY comes to mind. However, anyone who has ever been in a long term relationship, knows that the whole 50%-50% thing, is complete and utter bullshit! There are few times when it's actually 50%-50%. It's more like 80%-20% on either side of the fence, and flip flops back and forth, throughout the course of the relationship. That's reality, my friends.

Billy is great at putting little Pumpkie to sleep. That frees up evening time for me to get some alone time, blog, market, or simply enjoy having my friend, the remote, in my hand. Just the other night I was enjoying some down time. I went to the bathroom, did my business, and went for the toilet paper. That's when I realized that we were running out.

I searched for another roll, thinking I had a secret stash somewhere. No such luck (isn't that always the case?). I weighed the option of running to the store, but I was too tired to even attempt to go anywhere..... Ok, fine. I was being lazy! I looked at the roll and thought it out. There was almost 1/2 of a "double" roll left. Surely, we couldn't go through THAT much toilet paper in the morning, could we? Nah, it wasn't possible. I went to bed, assured, we were safe.

I woke at 6:30 in the morning to the first toilet flush. I shot straight up in bed! How did he manage to get out of bed without waking me? Shoot. I didn't get to tell him to ration. It's really quiet in there, what is he doing? Shouldn't he be getting in the shower? Maybe he's checking himself out in the mirror.

And then I heard the toilet flush AGAIN! Oh, no, no, no. Then the shower starts. I make a bee-line to the bathroom, since I now have to pee really badly. I look, and I almost cry. The toilet paper roll is empty! For the love of God!!! You have got to be kidding me? What man goes through the rest of the toilet paper, in a house full of girls?????

I have to pee, very, very badly, but I head to the kitchen to try and find a scrap of paper. We are out of paper towels, napkins, even tissue. Holy Mary, Mother of God....what am I going to do? I have nothing left in the house to wipe with. That's when I spotted the coffee pot, and I realized I still had coffee filters left. It'll have to do.....I grabbed my coffee filters and ran to the bathroom.

There's a little bit more to the story, but I'll spare you the specifics. In wondering why he used all of the toilet paper, I realized that we both could have used Pumpkie's baby wipes. My "teammate" left me hanging that morning. I improvised. We learned a little from it. We had a good laugh at each other and I, being the "better half", ran to the store to restock our paper goods.

Yes, I have to be the person to think of all of those little details. But he has other things he is responsible for. We are finding our balance, non of which is 50%-50%, but it works for us. However, if he pulls that stunt again, I will have a little fun of my own. Like hiding all of the toilet paper under the bed, late at night, so when he gets up in the morning, he'll have to figure it out. Or maybe I'll plastic wrap the toilet seat?? Hmmmm, decisions, decisions....but all in good fun!

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